Kharma

John had put on his boxers so I pulled on some pajamas. I didn’t want to be the only man left naked.

We sat on the couch watching as the others opened the bags containing their clothes. Randall pulled on his high tops.

“Nine thirty,” I noted. “That’s early for us these days.”

“Yeah, it’s been going so much later,” John agreed.

For a long time, I could count on the boy parties ending somewhere around nine thirty or ten. The men would show up close to seven, undress and cruise; various spots of activity would emerge; there would be ebbs and flows, a burst of money shots, and the men would be off to get on with their evenings.

It was so dependable, I often had dates after the orgies.

But that had changed in the autumn. Jimmy, the party organizer, had felt a need for fresh meat. He revised his website. He hired cute boys to take off their shirts in nightclubs to hand out flyers. He booked porn stars, go-go dancers and escorts as party attractions.

He even laid out a fruit platter.

Jimmy’s gambit paid off. The parties grew in size, with a new crop of top-shelf talent in the mix. As a result, the guys stayed later, hopped up for more of this refreshed sex crowd.

On this particular night, I hadn’t seen much of John, as he was late to arrive. My orgy boy toy Randall had shown up early; he stripped to his underwear and white baseball cap before settling in my lap to catch up. I caressed his long smooth torso and kissed his soft mahogany skin as he talked about his week—the clubs, the job, the family that doesn’t know he’s gay.

“Who can blame them?” he said, tossing his head. “I mean, look at me. Do I look even remotely gay?”

“You are pretty queeny, princess,” I said, patting his hand.

“Yeah, right? Still, my mother is hoping to arrange a wedding.”

“You can’t get married just yet. You are not allowed to lose your virginity with women on your own; that’s my project. I can’t leave so important a task to you—you’ll only fuck it up.”

He laughed. “You still think you can get me to fuck a girl?”

“It’s not as bad as you think.” I smiled at our recurring joke.

“It’s disgusting, Jefferson. But for you, I might do it.”

“You’re good to me,” I said, kissing his shoulder. “Now come on—let’s get this party started.”

He stood from my lap and reached for my hand.

A few men stood in my bedroom, jerking their cocks and watching porn as they stole glances at one another. This is typical of cruising as a party starts. No one wants to make the first move. This hesitation is not due to shyness; the men prefer to check out the full menu before making their selections.

Me, I already knew what I craved.

“Lay on the bed, princess,” I said.

Randall lay back on the pillows, looking around the room at the eyes on him. I dropped my shorts and leaned over to kiss him.

Randall is cute, and we crush on each other a little, so I like to start him off with soft kisses and gentle touches. I want him to feel my genuine affection, and, as we show off for others, I want our audience to see that my princess is well adored and cared for.

I nuzzled my nose down his flat, smooth belly and tugged his waistband. I looked to his face. His eyes were elsewhere, distracted by the other men.

Such endearing narcissism, I thought. I pulled down his underwear. His cock sprang forward.

“Baby, you shaved.” I gently touched the smooth skin that had replaced the patch I was prepared to groom with my tongue.

Randall looked down. “Yeah,” he smiled. “Do you like it? Just trying something new. I’ve got a date later, so I thought, you know, why not?”

“It’s cute,” I said, taking his shorts down his legs. I kissed his knees and thighs, working my way back to his cock. I took its curve into my hand, and brought it to my mouth.

Randall’s cock is lean and long, like his body, and by this time, I had learned it well. I kept him full in my mouth, edged to my throat, luxuriously savoring it on my tongue.

I knew to take slow care, to allow myself the taste and feel of him. If I worked too hard or too vigorously, my princess would take his cock from me. He didn’t want to cum so soon into a party.

I could restrain myself. I wanted his skin on my tongue for as long as Randall could endure it.

As I blew him, I harbored a fantasy: perhaps one day I would ask Randall for a date, just the two of us. I would tie him to my bed and suck him off, again and again, until he was fully depleted. Then, I would kiss him and let him sleep, my eyes alert for nocturnal erections that I would promptly murder with mouth.

It might do the boy good to have his orgasm out of his control. His youthful bubble of self-absorption might pop with each spurt I took.

“Careful, careful,” Randall whispered, taking his cock from my mouth. I had lost track of myself, nearly going too far.

“Sorry,” I said. “Too close, huh?”

He nodded, his eyes returning to the room. It was growing crowded.

“Okay, then you should blow me,” I said. I tapped his thigh and raised myself. “Get up, I want that spot.”

He nodded, sitting up. He turned the bill of his cap to the back.

I pet Randall’s cap as he blew me. Now in his position, I could see why his eyes had been distracted.

There were some hot men milling about.

A cluster had formed near the door. It centered on a giant man with a shaved head, strong features and a well-sculpted body. He was statuesque as he accepted the admiration of the hands and mouths surrounding him.

Two other bald muscle boys were in the cluster. The others were all handsome, one or two in designer underwear that clung to designer bodies.

Randall looked up. He glanced over at the group. “Come on,” he said, sitting up. He reached for my hand.

I took his hand and stood to follow.

I stood behind Randall, my arms wrapped around his body as he moved close. I kissed his neck as the giant reached out to touch my princess’s chest. I prepared to relinquish Randall to the others.

The giant leaned forward. He stretched over Randall’s shoulder to kiss me, full on the lips.

He wrapped his vast arm around my back, pulling us both to him.

As the giant held us in the cocoon of his embrace, his admirers’ hands and mouths swarmed to light on our bodies. In the penumbra of our patron’s imprimatur, Randall and I were now chosen to share in the acolytes’ ravishing attentions.

My chest leapt. I hadn’t expected to be drawn in, to be made to feel so admired for something so simple, and elusive, as beauty.

I rarely lack for confidence; I am content with my appearance. Nonetheless, I would never mistake the fortune of my good looks for the trappings of the truly beautiful, the physical perfection reserved for gay men who parlay hometown handsomeness into tickets to New York, to be feted with gym memberships and Chelsea apartments, porn films and magazine spreads, weekends on Fire Island, gratis, in exchange for the sheer pleasure others gain in simply being able to fawn upon their perfection, shirtless and godlike.

The giant wanted me in the mix of these handsome men, knowing nothing of me but that I pleased his eye. He seemed prepared to hoist me and my princess onto his wide shoulders as ornaments to the pedestal on which he was placed.

I felt the swell of that potential. I could feel beauty surging from its stations in my chest and mind to my face and my body, ready to be visible, to be praised, to be admired, simply for being.

Randall’s eyes closed, ecstatic.

A sober thought chased way the drug of narcissism.

I had made a wish just weeks before, and it had come true—I had been granted all of my birthday blowjobs. It was not right that I should now be elevated to admiration. It was time for me to give something back.

I mean, fair’s fair.

I nested my head against the giant’s neck. I twisted my hair against his skin and slowly twirled my way across his broad chest and ripped torso. I dropped to my knees, gazing up at him, as I licked his cock.

I swallowed him slowly. He was too big for me to take entirely, but I took enough to show that I meant business. I reached to his ass and pulled him in, letting him know he should not hesitate to fuck my face hard.

He began to give it to me.

I reached to my right and took Randall’s cock in my hand. Another man pressed in; I took his cock in my left. I could feel other men closing against my back, pressing themselves to my skin.

I had positioned myself as the cock slut for this assembly. I would have to perform at my best.

I bobbed my face up and down the giant’s shaft, tonguing him with coaxing pulses. He quickly rewarded me by pulling out and shooting on my neck and chest. He grunted in heaves.

I smiled at him as I reached for another cock.

I alternated my mouth between three cocks now, no longer wasting much time on eye contact. I kept Randall’s cock in my right hand as my lifeline. I stroked him gently, keeping him well on edge.

Another man came for me, raining on my shoulders. I was already at work on another man.

Randall pushed close. I turned to his cock and, looking up, took him in me.

I snaked a hand between his legs and up his back. I took his wrist in my hand and brought it with me as I searched out his other. My mouth worked his cock as I pinned his wrists in my grip.

One day, I would have to tell Randall all the ways I am triggering his submission, but for now, this was my secret.

Another man stood behind my princess. He wrapped his arms through Randall’s, reaching to hold his chest.

With my free hand, I reached to pat the man’s leg, signaling my gratitude. We now had Randall locked between us.

I lowered my lips to the base of Randall’s cock, holding him in my throat. Keeping him in place, I took his thigh and lifted it onto my shoulder. His foot dangled over my ass. His weight rested on his other leg.

I shifted slightly, and then lifted his other leg onto my remaining shoulder. Randall gasped as he fell backwards against the other man.

I began to stand.

We now had Randall suspended between us, his arms locked by the other man, his wrists locked in my hand. I bobbed my mouth up and down his cock. My free hand teased across his torso.

Randall was quivering.

I caught the other man’s eye and looked to the bed behind him. I stepped forward, causing him to step back. He sat on the bed, causing Randall’s head to dip downward. His cap tumbled to the floor.

I stepped again, and the man fell back, with Randall splayed over him.

I released my hold on Randall’s wrists and stooped. I took his knees from my shoulders, never letting his cock from my mouth. I rested my forearm across his belly.

He had stopped me before. Now, I wanted his orgasm.

I knew his cock well enough to play his triggers. He made no effort to contain himself.

I sat back, panting as he shot over his body. He moaned as waves left him.

As it subsided, he looked down at me. He smiled. I smiled back.

Smiling, I lifted Randall’s leg, rolled him off the other man, and set myself to sucking my accomplice’s cock.

We had put on some spectacle for other men, who now closed in on the body prone on the bed. They jerked as they watched me blow him, preparing to use the man’s body as their cum dumpster.

He was hard in my mouth. He leaned his head back to take a cock into his own face.

From my vantage, I watched as man after man came on him, covering him in skeins of jism.

I spit out his cock as he reached to finish himself off. His shot topped off the gobs covering him.

I stood and looked down at him. “Shower?”

He laughed. A couple of the guys helped him up and he followed me into the bathroom. I started up the shower pulled him in after me.

My accomplice introduced himself as Carlos.

After our shower, I ran into John in the hallway.

“Oh hey, I didn’t see you arrive,” I said.

“Yeah, you were busy,” he grinned. “You were really going to town in there!”

I nodded. “Just giving back to kharma.”

We sat to talk as the men began to leave.

Randall tied his shoes and came over to kiss us goodbye.

“Have fun on your date tonight,” I said, nuzzling his cheek.

“This better be a good date, if I’m leaving here,” he said, wrapping a scarf around his neck. “At least, if he doesn’t want to have sex, I’ve already taken care of that.”

“Sex before a date.” I tapped my forehead. “Takes the edge off. You’re a smart fellow.”

“Yeah, right?”

Just then, there was a knock at the door. Jimmy went to answer.

“Aw, poor guy,” John winced. “He missed the party.”

“Yeah, tough,” I shrugged. Jimmy would have to get rid of this late arrival; I was looking forward to an early night.

Jimmy opened the door.

John looked at me.

I raised an eyebrow.

Evidently, kharma had been impressed by my offering.