Saturday, December 15, 2007

Fleshbot and Pomegranates

This week’s Sex Blog Roundup at Fleshbot takes an unexpected turn for the unexpected, those moments when we surprise no one more than ourselves.

Those of you who enjoy stalking me will find Bridget adding mythos to our proto-relationship in college, a time when she thinks I might’ve danced to Depeche Mode—though girlfriend, even I’m not that gay. She also recounts finding true love while dating me.

Lynsey takes pandering to a new high by paying lip service to my kisses in a blatant appeal for blog traffic. I would accuse her of kissing ass, but that would be a disservice to her actual ass kissing, which is pretty phenomenal, actually.

Speaking of sucking up, I’d like to welcome a new sponsor, WebCam Reports. I was going to review the site, but I found myself distracted by all the naked people on webcams. I had forgotten how much I enjoy looking at naked people on my computer screen. In fact, if you’ve got a cam and you want me to look you over, drop a line.

Otherwise, click over to WebCam Reports, which includes a fine assortment, including some kink. The site does need to improve its clumsy text, however. Perhaps they should hire someone to rewrite the copy. Let’s see, who do we know who can produce good online smut . . . ?

The fellow behind WebCam Reports, my pal Tony, did me the favor of submitting a new menu item to the Perverts Cookbook. Doesn’t this sound tasty?

Here’s a really simple dish I came up with a few years ago. I was living with D, my longest-running relationship to date. Well, longer is not always better, and we only lasted so long because I was too much of a coward to break up with her.

My attitude was that if I don’t fuck her for long enough, eventually she’d break up with me. Who the hell would’ve guessed the stamina a woman has when she thinks she has a potential father/protector for her unborn cubs. (If you ever read this, D, I did love you for a while, especially in Jerusalem, but it just passed away).

But I digress. Here’s a little something I made when I was still trying to impress D and her urban kibbutz social set. It took the room by storm, even though nothing could be simpler to make. The dish has a strangely sexy feel, probably perfect for debauchery.

Take a few pomegranates. Go for the deep red-colored ones, try and avoid pomegranates that have a washed-out pink color. Peel carefully, getting all the juicy seeds into a bowl. It’s best to do this naked since, much like diamonds, pomegranate stains are forever.

Place pomegranate seeds into a bowl.

Grate chocolate over the pomegranate seeds. (Look around for some nice dark chocolate; bitter is definitely better.)

Add a tad of lemon juice.

Mix and serve. Make sure to lick the bowl.

Thanks for the tip, Tony.


Jocasta said...

"staking you"? Are you a vampire now? Sorry, but I have to point out the typo. That and tell that guy its a parquet floor. Geez!

Meanwhile, I think the pomegranite seeds and chocolate idea sounds quite intriquing...gonna have to try that.

Jefferson said...

Oh, life's little ironies. If you hasten to correct someone else's typos and spelling errors, you are sure to make one yourself.

Bianca said...

I was going to point out the parquet thing as well because it drives me crazy.

And now there are even more mistakes. This has become a comedy of typos.

Bridget said...

Dude. I said it to you earlier and now I shall say it for the *world* to hear:

You are *so* that gay.

GaygaygayGAY. ;)

I'll have to get you a leather cap and a leather vest to prove it to you.

And hellloooo, you already have the leather boots!

Please take up a collection for leather pants.

Just sayin'

Ace said...

We have a pomegranite tree and I was all set to make a wreath with the pom's in them and of all years to do so, there weren't any pom's! Instead we have a mulititude of pecans.

Jocasta said...

I'm sure I'll make plenty of mistakes and my writing errors are the least of it.

Hell, there was a glaring typo in the paragraph of my one and only flesh botting to date. Staring staight at me.....shudder......