Friday, June 01, 2007

Fleshbot and Seven Figures

This week’s Sex Blog Roundup at Fleshbot dives in with bloggers who like their sex wet and slippery. Splish splash, y’all.

Those of you who enjoy stalking me will have to read between the lines this week, as I’m more often in people’s thoughts than in their beds.

You’ll find me on Lily’s mind, as she gets a poet all hot and bothered by fantasizing about a bukkake party at my place. Pretty heady stuff, especially considering that she had only recently taken the poet’s virginity.

You’ll also find me on Wendy’s mind in her new sex blog, as she ponders Lily’s advice to get over a painful breakup by meeting me for sex. Does she? (Here’s a hint: Wendy’s got a new sex blog.)

Speaking of beds, my bed frame has been broken (again) by an orgy (again). When I purchased my bed, I was told that it had a fifteen-year warranty. That was two years ago this month.

I’m going to replace the bed frame with no fuss. Around here, beds are like wine glasses at a Jewish wedding—it's good luck to break them.

Mazel tov!

On the day my bed was replaced two years ago, my statcounter registered six figures for the first time. In its first six months, One Life, Take Two had garnered one hundred thousand hits.

Today, the odometer rolled over to seven figures with the one millionth hit.

Half of those visits have been made in the past ten months.

Thanks so much for staying with me. Now, if you’ll all just drop a dollar in the collection plate as it passes . . . daddy needs a new bed frame.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on the hit count. Good luck with the bed frame. :-)

Bridget said...

No, see, what Daddy needs (besides dining chairs) is a titanium / platinum /some other strange metal ending in "num" that's pretty damn strong bed frame in something bigger than that g*ddamned "full"size mattress b.s. you keep insisting is big enough for 1)all the boinking you do and 2) for you and the kids watching tv all at once.

Wrong on both counts. I'll contribute to a queen size bed or larger. ;)

...now, there's a *huge* joke there about "queen" and "you" somewhere in there, but I'd be digressing even more if I made it.

Not that you don't already know what it is.

Oh hush. You know you're a bigger bitch than I am.

And btw, thanks to you (again) I have re-entered a "must have a bagel w/cream cheese" every day phase.

I swear. I'm getting Lillie a puppy. A cocker spaniel!

Viviane said...

Congratulations, cherie.

Perhaps instead of all these porn affiliates, you might set up a new bed fund!

(The captcha says "simpbeb")

Anonymous said...

But the real question is; How's the Mattress pad holding up?

No Cockers. A Beagle perhaps.

Anna Smash said...

I would be willing to bet that the doorman to your building will know exactly where the delivery guy with the new bed frame is headed.

(And ditto on the dining chairs.)

Anonymous said...

Instead of donating my money to various social causes and injustices (go ahead; Google "Darfur"), you've convinced me otherwise.