Thursday, September 14, 2006

Sex Camp

First aid kit, flashlight, matches, towel, toiletries, pajama bottoms, sheets, pillow, flask, notebook, pens.

Flogger, paddle, cane, cat o’nine tails, rope, vibrator, condoms, assorted dildos.

I’m packing for sex camp.

Dark Odyssey is this weekend, and I will be there with my friends Viviane, Selina and Marcus.

Viviane has been pouring over the schedule of classes, suggesting those we should attend in the front row. Selina asked if we would object to her continuous nudity and offered to bring harem pillows and a disco ball to enliven our cabin.

Marcus asked if he should bring his restraint. I told him I wasn’t aware he had any restraint. Then I realized he was referring to “restraints,” as in bondage gear.

I haven’t seen Marcus all summer.

Now I will see him for a weekend devoted to, we are told, “Tantra, Polyamory, Intimate Communications, BDSM, Alternative Lifestyles and more.”

With Marcus along, it’s the “more” that should prove most interesting. He always likes more.

Frankly, I’m a little grumpy to be leaving sex in the city, even for sex in the wilds. I’ll miss out on all the fucking I might be doing in my comfortable bed in favor of deep-woodsing it with dungeon masters, pyromaniacs and mosquitoes.

But, you know me. I keep an open mind.

I’ve already been in touch with some of the friendly folks I’ll soon meet.

I was asked to join a finger-painting class. I’m told it will be “unconventional.”

A woman asked me to lend my cock to a morning gangbang where she hopes to outdo her personal best of twenty-five men. I asked if any low numbers were still available.

I’ve developed a crush on a dyke who’s handy with the ropes. I’ll just melt if she asks for my help in lassoing a filly to hoist to the branches.

I get around, folks. But this is all new to me. I’ll be a babe in the woods.

Still, this little lamb will be in the warm company of the doyenne, the hippie and the whore. We’ve packed bourbon. We won’t get into too much trouble—will we?


Lioness said...

Oh please, get in trouble. *grin*
DarkOdyssey looks like loads of fun. Some west coast pervs I know are attending and honestly, a party with them is bound to be a good time. Throw your crew into the mix and there's inevitable goodness (and badness) for all.
Have fun!

AlwaysArousedGirl said...

I gotta move out of the midwest. We don't have anything like that out here.


Have fun, Jefferson.

Incorrigible Girl said...

-grins- So can't wait for the stories from this ... on all the blogs. Enjoy!

Avah said...

Too much, even for me!

Cdk said...

Have a great time!

Goose and Gander said...

Oooh! Ropelover, Ms. B. Harrington is going to be there. She's awesome!

Bad Kitty said...

Have fun!! I can't wait to hear your stories.

Tess said...

Can't think of better company to be in.

Sounds like a damn fun time.

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.

Mitzi said...

I haven’t seen Marcus all summer.

Now I will see him for a weekend devoted to, we are told, “Tantra, Polyamory, Intimate Communications, BDSM, Alternative Lifestyles and more.”

You two will be the Naughty boys sitting in back of the classroom.

"Laura" in AK said...

Not that there's ANYTHING wrong with sex in the woods...

Especially for me.


Juno Henry said...

Pyjama bottoms?

For pity's sake, what on earth for?

;-) *evil grin*

Nichole Sidhe said...

Can I please come along next year? I promise to be anything but good.

Viviane said...

Goose & Lioness - I'll send your regards.

Mitzi - The boys will be the naughtiest, I'm sure.

Juno - One needs something to wear at meals!

We're off to see the perverts!

french said...

I thought getting in trouble was the entire point?

Bianca said...

Oooh, this sounds like too much fun!

But for heaven's sake, don't forget to pack your bug spray!

(Please note, this is coming from a Canadian girl who has spent many summers in the mosquito infested wilderness of Manitoba)

exile said...

earl: "if you woke up with mud on your knees and a condom hang'n out of you're ass, would you tell anyone?"

lester: "no"

earl: "wanna go camp'n?"

Avah said...

Welcome home baby!! I missed you!