Halo organized a photo shoot that involved painting on flesh, and recruited Ava Amnesia and me among her models. Her plan was to script our bodies with emotional and sexual words using the phonetic alphabet; you can see that my foot is labeled lasivies, or "lascivious." I'll cop to that.
Late in the shoot, smudges of paint accentuated the bruises already coloring Ava's breasts from bitings I'd given her over several days. Additional colors transferred to her body from mine when we, um, mixed paint.
The life of a parent, and pervert, in New York City.
When told by my wife that our fifteen-year relationship was over, I found that everything in my life was upended. I took solace when friends and family pointed out I was no longer responsible for her personal happiness, just my own—and that of my four children.
I went into marriage as a bisexual kid, suspicious of monogamy. I was a good husband, and played by the rules. Now I'm single again, and wondering if I didn't have it right back then.
This blog picks up my new life in progress—the life of a parent, and pervert, in New York City.
Photograph by Adrian Buckmaster Photography. New York, NY. July 5, 2015.
(c) 2004-2019. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License.
Jefferson
View My Complete Profile
I went into marriage as a bisexual kid, suspicious of monogamy. I was a good husband, and played by the rules. Now I'm single again, and wondering if I didn't have it right back then.
This blog picks up my new life in progress—the life of a parent, and pervert, in New York City.
Photograph by Adrian Buckmaster Photography. New York, NY. July 5, 2015.
(c) 2004-2019. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License.
Jefferson
View My Complete Profile
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
No One Cares About Your Blog
Last August, I participated in Kink for All, an unconference on sexuality founded by my friend Maymay. During last night’s broadcast of Kink on Tap—another brainchild of brainy Maymay—I learned that my presentation, which was recorded, is available online.
No One Cares About Your Blog
My tongue was somewhat in cheek when I entitled the presentation, which concerned the risks of putting one’s sex life online. I addressed my ex wife’s discovery of my blog and her subsequent (and unsuccessful) effort to use my sexuality to take my children from their father. I also talked about the flame wars and smear campaigns initiated by a team of three sex bloggers—Dacia and the brain trust she encouraged, Tess and Dee—as they outed me and otherwise sought to tarnish my reputation and affect the custody case then underway.
The title was in earnest, however, as the lessons drawn as these episodes overlapped. My ex wife cynically believed that the State of New York would concur that my writing endangered my children. In fact, the State of New York proved unconcerned with either my writing or my sex life. My ex learned that, like everyone else, the father of her children is allowed free speech and sexual freedom. The State of New York doesn’t care about my blog.
Further, in their slanderous gossip and malicious online attacks, Dacia, Tess and Dee seemed to believe their blogs were powerful engines to destroy reputations and damage people, including families. Their actions revealed wild delusions of import. Putting gossip into blogs doesn’t make it real or influential. Dacia later regretted this “feverish, sad drama” as a figment largely of her own creation. Their attacks were engineered by blog drama, not in reality, and in real life, no one cared about their blogs.
My tongue was somewhat in cheek when I entitled the presentation, which concerned the risks of putting one’s sex life online. I addressed my ex wife’s discovery of my blog and her subsequent (and unsuccessful) effort to use my sexuality to take my children from their father. I also talked about the flame wars and smear campaigns initiated by a team of three sex bloggers—Dacia and the brain trust she encouraged, Tess and Dee—as they outed me and otherwise sought to tarnish my reputation and affect the custody case then underway.
The title was in earnest, however, as the lessons drawn as these episodes overlapped. My ex wife cynically believed that the State of New York would concur that my writing endangered my children. In fact, the State of New York proved unconcerned with either my writing or my sex life. My ex learned that, like everyone else, the father of her children is allowed free speech and sexual freedom. The State of New York doesn’t care about my blog.
Further, in their slanderous gossip and malicious online attacks, Dacia, Tess and Dee seemed to believe their blogs were powerful engines to destroy reputations and damage people, including families. Their actions revealed wild delusions of import. Putting gossip into blogs doesn’t make it real or influential. Dacia later regretted this “feverish, sad drama” as a figment largely of her own creation. Their attacks were engineered by blog drama, not in reality, and in real life, no one cared about their blogs.
Labels:
blog drama,
custody,
KinkForAll,
KinkOnTap,
Maymay,
sex blog
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Thursday, June 03, 2010
HNT
Making art is a fine advantage of having creative friends who enjoy getting naked for one another.
Tilda had an idea. She wanted to cull quotes on sexuality that had been important in her personal development and picture them on nude bodies. She wanted it to be hands-on; the texts would be imprinted on bodies and then photographed. She ran ideas by me and then decided to draft me as a calligrapher.
The models are our friends. Halo is my dear protégé. Leo is a fellow you recently read about.
The quote is from George Bataille’s The Story of The Eye. It reads:
“We did not lack modesty—on the contrary—but something urgently drove us to defy modesty together as immodestly as possible.”
. . . and so defy we did. My handiwork was primarily on Halo. I had many words to script on a small body, and as I painted, I stayed modest by contrast to Tilda’s bold proclamation of not lacking modesty.
Top photo courtesy Michael Meyer Photography.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)